Letting Go – Day 21

30-Day Writing Challenge

One of the most difficult lessons in life is that we have very little control over what happens. For a controlling person that schedules every second and aims to achieve all their goals, this lesson can be demoralizing. 

This lesson also applies to the people that discovered a person or path that excites them every single day, hoping this feeling never disappears. 

I’m both of these people… 

I never allow myself to enjoy the space in-between milestones, always seeking out the next “thing”. This mentality is definitely practical, but it’s not always a wise approach. 

These “in-between spaces” in life are what make up most of life, so by ignoring this grey space, I’m ignoring what matters most. In addition to ignoring the most important piece of life, I’m afraid of losing what excites me most and that’s a recipe for disaster. 

The specific example I’m referring to is my interest in cybersecurity and what a career in this field could look like. The feeling I get from researching and envisioning a future in this field is something I’ve not felt in a long time. This is exciting but equally concerning. 

I’m treating this excitement like a burning ember that I’m nurturing, hoping it grows into a roaring flame, but by nurturing this ember too much I could deprive it of oxygen. I know I’m getting meta, but hear me out. By constantly worrying about this excitement disappearing and reverting back into a life centered around finding my next thing, I’m not thoroughly enjoying the process (e.g. “in-between space”). 

To avoid any delay in enjoyment and the possibility for future disappointment I’m trying to let go, realizing the only thing in my control is my response to life. 

This mental mantra has helped me with the anxiety that arises whenever I start to concern myself with losing interest. If you’re at all like me this exercise is worth a try.